lyrics

I'm Your Stab In The Back

  • Brown/Blue

    If I could say anything, I'd say it all right now
    If I could be anyone, I'd be who you saw in me last week.

    The brown in your blue eyes, gets me everytime
    I wish you got me like that.

    If I could change anything, I'd change it all right now
    If I could be anyone, I'd be who you saw in me last week.

    The brown in your blue eyes, gets me everytime
    I wish you got me like that.

  • Throwing Stones

    If I turned it off right now, would it still lamp the room
    With a soft arthritic glow, and a strong prosthetic hue.
    If I pressed stop today, would this keep playing,
    Would this keep playing, would there be worth in staying.

    There's something outside this room, and every night,
    It throws stones at my window.

    The plastic in your please, and your forced synthetic needs,
    They just show off the weak, scenes in your dreams.
    If perfect came today, would you keep swaying
    Would you keep swaying, would there be a chance of saying.

    There's something outside this room, and every night,
    It throws stones at my window.

    Standing Still.

  • Except the Grey

    The x's on, the calendar are,
    losing their ink.
    The zippers on your amber eyes, everynight are,
    Losing their blink.

    I count down the days here,
    You wear out your ways here,
    I can't see anything,
    Except the grey,
    And I'm sorry for that.

    The same old fights,
    Through the bathroom door,
    Are losing their sheen.
    The same old nights,
    Up for hours,
    Watching you sleep.

    I count down the days here,
    You wear out your ways here,
    I can't see anything except the grey,
    And I'm sorry for that.
    Except the grey,
    And I'm sorry for that,
    So sorry for that.

    I'm your, stab in the back,
    And I'm so, sorry for that.
    I'm sorry.

    I count down the days here,
    You wear out your ways here,
    I can't see anything except the grey,
    And I'm sorry for that.
    Except the grey,
    And I'm sorry for that,
    So sorry for that.

  • Special Thanks

    Thanks for all the opaque walls
    You used to hold me in
    Thanks for all the one-wayed halls
    With ever narrowed ends

    And special thanks, for all the times
    I spent thinking of you
    While you were just thinking of him

    Thanks for looking out for me
    Through your shattered lens
    And thanks for waking next to me
    With the same somnolence

    And special thanks, for all the times
    I spent thinking of you
    While you were just thinking of him

    What's another, what's another
    What's another year.

  • Last Times are Golden

    If we wait on the sound, it may never come
    If I have to wait on you, I'd rather call it off
    If we wait on the weight, of what's to come
    I'd bet it all, I'd bet it all.

    When was the last time, you slept soundly
    The whole night through
    When was the last time, you felt the same way
    About this as I do.

    The routes in our days, aren't synching up
    You hate all the same, nights that I love
    For you it's a waste, for me it's a glove
    It's a glove.

    When was the last time, you slept soundly
    The whole night through
    When was the last time, you felt the same way
    About this as I do.

    When was the, the last time, I can count on you.

  • The Number Four

    I'm letting go, I'm letting go.
    Like I should have done 4 years ago
    Been cradling this little knife,
    Making sure the blade's all shine.

    I'll hold it up to the light, cause it's far too dim in here.
    Hold it up to the light, cause it's been pitch black in here.

    I love you so, I love you so.
    At least I think I did, 4 days ago.
    Been cradling this little knife,
    Making sure the blade's all shine.
    Hold it up all night.

    I'll hold it up to the light, cause it's far too dim in here.
    Hold it up to the light, cause it's been pitch black in here.
    Hold it up all night. All night.

    I'm nodding off, and you're not enough. Never enough.
    Stay here? Yeah right.

  • Fear of Flying

    Downtown's five blocks away, meet me at The Redroom half past eight.
    Don't be late.
    The corner booth, just wait for me there.
    Oh yeah, and don't put up your hair.
    I like it just fine down.

    Girl you look, perfect tonight.
    I thought you would, yeah I thought you might
    Stay here, just tonight.

    One flight, five hours away. Meet me at the airport, San Jose.
    Via JFK.
    The baggage claim, just wait for me there
    Oh yeah, and don't forget that pair,
    Of glasses in your picture.

    Girl you look, perfect tonight.
    I thought you would, yeah I thought you might
    Stay here, just tonight.

    The ticket I buy tonight, it won't change anything.
    It won't change anything.
    The ticket I use tomorrow, it'll change everything.
    It'll change everything. Everything. Everything.

  • Lowlight
    Outside, I can see your breath
    But you're not there, and mine is hardly left.
    Twilight, feels the morning press
    Above, every star, is seamed with your duress.
    Inside, I can hear each step
    But they're not yours, a sleepless dream at best.
    As black skies, flow to auburn reds
    To wake the night and of me what is left.
    If I don't want to see you, it's because it hurts too much
    All this time spent wondering if I was just a crutch.
    Waiting for the day to kill this night, and carry with it you away forever.
  • Europa
    Haven't been here before, animated by the thought of your light, the thought of your curve across my sky.
    This is your chance to shine, so please don't tame the nights now - don't stop, please don't slow down.
    Once so obscure, eclipsed by the gray in your eyes, your shell, embossed, alkalized.
    You own these nights, so please don't sway the tides now, don't stop, please don't slow down.
    Don't stop, please don't slow down.
    Just keep spinning on your way, a promise now for fevered nights, a promise now for everything.
    Don't stop, please don't slow down.
  • Plastic Crown
    If this rumor's true, you better tell her. I can hardly look your way.
    My memory constricts all the good times, now they seem so fake.
    Through everything, if anything, I looked up to you,
    now I just look down, and everything you've done, that you can't undo,
    I think we deserve the truth.
    Your common sense, and all you've ever said, means close to nothing to me now
    and by the way, how could you anyway? I can see you now,
    in your plastic crown, with your watered down dreams
    Dragging her whole world out
    and if this is true, then you're just a fake, and I can't trust you now.
    So look me in the eyes and be, everything you always wanted me to be.
    Always so strong so why now so weak - are you really just a coward?
    You planted these seeds, you built this disease,
    Why grow them just to throw them out?
    Shame and self indulgence can't give you, the one thing she never wants to live without,
    Will you leave her all alone, with the keepsakes she'll never throw out .
    the keepsakes she'll never throw out.
  • Dear Shannon
    I just want to let you know that I'm letting go -
    my hand is just a ghost in yours.
    My nights trace your words -
    "it's not like you haven't done this to me before"
    but what's a weak excuse, after all we've been through and now, now I sleep alone. You swore you were mine but now I sleep alone.
    Remember how we were? - Hands held tight, singing in my car.
    You were always way better than me, but you never said a word when I was out of key.
    Now there's nothing we can do - I fucked it up and so did you and now we sleep alone. You swore you were mine but now we sleep alone.
    You swore you were mine.
  • Last November

    This is the hard part - the part that keeps me awake.
    This is the hardest part - the part where I'd come in, if I thought you'd notice, if I'd rehearsed my lines. I'll try to write them down on my palm next time.

    Since I've been here, it's gotten colder. Wake up freezing, the leaves are turning. Your soft caress, content and in my memory, so picturesque.

    Pale cheeks glow red, let's sleep til it's over. You'd rest your head, on my shoulder. Like now was then, and this was more than a memory, so picturesque.

    I can almost hear the wind above the ringing in my ears - the same familiar scent from about this time last year.
    Looking outside, the clouds that cover gray. The rain from last November may never wash away.

Just Enough Bright

  • Angel and I
    Looking back, on all the times we strained to have, vacant eyes, a sometimes smile. Thinking back, on all the things we almost did, I hope you had a good time.
    Angel, ever divine, you'll never be mine.
    About the pictures, that we hardly took, hope they come out alright.
    Regarding the ring, you always talked about, I'm sure it'll fit you just fine.
    Angel, ever divine, you'll never be mine.
    Just one question, you never answered, you never learned.
    Just one question, and your lips, never shaped the words.
    Angel, ever divine, you'll never be mine.
    You'll never be mine.
  • Thin Like Paper
    It's alright if you got me wrong. There's no way I'm giving up.
    Maybe it's right, or maybe it's wrong and you just don't see it.
    I know one thing for sure, your conversation doesn't cure.
    It's thin like paper and so are your words in the way they waiver.
    Tomorrow when we go our separate ways,
    maybe you'll see the light you helped create, shining on its own.
    Up all night and you're telling me, what you think I should be.
    You must be numb, because right now I swear I can't help but feel it.
    And if I know one thing, no matter how hard I sing,
    you just won't hear me, because right now you couldn't be much more near me.
    Tomorrow when we go our separate ways,
    maybe you'll see the light you helped create, shining on its own.
    Think you have all the answers.
    Dim skies crop your words, unsure, unrehearsed.
    As if to tell you, that they can't trust you.
    All sighs and, you're trying, to take the feeling out of this.
    But you can't take it out of me.
    Think you have all the answers, but you can't..
    You can't take this away.
  • Leaving
    Not quite alone, not quite in company. Not quite with you, though so unwithout you
    I try not to say too much, feeling distanced.
    I try not to say too much, the distance destroys what I am.
    Just so you know. (just so you know) I just plain stopped trying.
    Just so you know. (just so you know) I made up my mind and..
    Not quite myself, not quite anyone
    Not quite in love, yet drowning in your love.
    Your love drowns out who I am.
    Just so you know, (just so you know) I just plain stopped trying.
    Just so you know, (just so you know) I made up my mind and I'm leaving you.
    I don't feel alive, at all. (I don't feel at all)
    I don't feel alive at all.
  • Rain on Sundays
    Sundays never fall quite right, will they just be swept away.
    Under this endless skyline, my frame this windowpane.
    If I die tonight, will your memories of me, just fade.
    Because I can't forget, the first time you looked up at me.
    The first time that I.. and I can't forget, the first time you looked up at me,
    The first time I heard you say my name.
    These rains swell to drown the drive, lose me in the spray
    and the million dotted lines, on the asphalt underneath.
    If I die tonight, will your memories of me, just fade.
    Can't wait till Sunday when I can hear your laugh again.
    The first time that I.. and I can't forget, the first time you looked up at me,
    The first time I heard you say my name.
    Now I wouldn't have it any other way.
  • The Reason I stay
    If you were here right now I wouldn't right this down at all.
    I'd think out loud, embracing you in a calm confessional.
    If you were here right now, I wouldn't write this song at all.
    I'd sing out loud, and hope that you don't just laugh it off.
    I stay here because it makes too much sense not to, too much sense not to.
    If you could hear me now I'd be careful not to say,
    How I've cancelled all my plans to go away.
    Sometimes when you're around, it cancels out the gray,
    But more than not, you tack it on in your lightless way.
    I stay here because it makes too much sense not to, too much sense not to.
    My joints buckle, from the weight of this wall.
  • If the Fault Fits
    Please just blame me for everything, you can leave the others out.
    It's all my fault, it's all my..
    Please just hate me for everything, you've got me figured out.
    It's all my fault, it's all my..
    The hours I stole from you last night, weren't enough to make this right.
    So suffocate me here for a while, because I deserve every lost breath.
    Please just wake me from every dream, the scenes are timing out.
    It's all my fault, it's all my..
    Please just take me from everything, I really care about.
    It's all my fault, it's all my fault.
    The hours I stole from you last night, weren't enough to make this right.
    So suffocate me here for a while, because I deserve every lost breath.
    All the times I wrote it off, you were right all along and I was wrong.
    It won't all just absolve, in a half-truth epilogue, creased with wrong
  • Your Abrasion
    You can count all you like, but it won't add up.
    In your tired mind, or your more tired book.
    You killed it today, as if it hasn't meant anything,
    Forgetting the weight of what used to have meaning.
    It used to have meaning.
    Abrading, watching as you shave this down to nothing, until there's nothing left.
    Waiting, as you arm yourself with turpentine and burn me off just like the rest.
    So you've drained all the life, from these swollen lungs.
    To dumb down the time, and egg on the rust.
    You killed it today, as if it hasn't meant anything.
    Forgetting the weight, of what used to have meaning.
    Abrading, watching as you shave this down to nothing, until there's nothing left.
    Waiting, for you to arm yourself with turpentine and burn me off just like the rest.
    Would you be happy then?
    All this for nothing.
  • In Waiting
    Strange how it happens, one glance, by chance and nothing more.
    Strange how it happens, a stranger has never meant so much before.
    Now we wait like the sky before it rains, for it to pour.
    If we wait like the sky before it rains, will it ever pour.
    Strange how we wonder, false nights, false words and nothing more.
    Strange how we wonder, even stranger how it can't be ignored.
    Now we wait like the sky before it rains, for it to pour.
    If we wait like the sky before it rains, will it ever pour.
    This time, I'll have to pass on us for now.
    But next life, I'll try to catch up somehow.
  • Sleep and Matchbooks
    Now you can smoke all you want, hope it makes you feel as good as I did, as I did.
    I just hope that you miss me, at least half as much as you missed your, cigarettes.
    I miss the us we never were, come on let's be honest.
    Now he can call you all he wants, I won't be around to tell him, you're fast asleep.
    I just hope that you miss me, at least half as much as you missed your, cigarettes.
    I miss the us we never were, come on, let's be honest.
    I miss the us we never were.
  • Flicker
    The cadence in this silence ruins me, an amethyst glow always seems to keep,
    Just enough bright around, to help you place your thoughts, In all the right spots.
    The songs you used to hum all night, and the words that always read just right,
    Can make it so hard to watch it, flicker and descend.
    The arc of this dream crushes every vein, A shallow depression always seems to save,
    Just enough certainty to taper off your faults, with all the right calls.
    The songs you used to hum all night, and the words that always read just right,
    Can make it so hard to watch it, flicker and descend.
    The songs you used to hum all night.

Walls Between Us

  • Balance
    The balance shifts and weighs me down
    Just like it used to. Tarnished fears and muffled shouts
    Guide the way down. The memories always find a way
    To cancel out the dreams. They shine on every last flaw
    And rip at every seam. I can hear it on a clear day. (I know I can hear you).
    When the light hits the water In the perfect way. The solace never stays for
    long. Time proves useless
    Dimly lit the kerosene On the mantle. The memories always find a way to
    cancel out the dreams. They shine on every last flaw and rip at every seam. I
    can hear it on a clear day.
    (I know I can hear you). When the light hits the water
    In the perfect way. And I can just make out the words.
    They say: don't stop. I can just make out the words
    (I can almost hear them sing.)
  • Here With You
    Hardly awake here. If that says enough.
    Your love doesn't take here. Mine turns to dust.
    If this means anything. It doesn't mean enough
    I've done everything. And I'm still broken up
    I try not to fight. I just try to understand.
    You define what's important to me.
    What's left to decide. What's left to understand.
    Hearts are just toys here. Mine's been played enough
    Quiet just makes noise here. My volume's up.
    If this means anything at all.
    It doesn't close to mean enough.
    Cause I've done everything
    And I'm still broken up.
    I try not to fight. I just try to understand.
    You define what's important to me.
    What's left to decide. What's left to understand.
    As far as I can tell, you're not happy at all.
  • Your Arms the Blades
    All I want is for you to be there
    When I get home
    Cause I miss you already
    I miss you
    My only request is that you'll be waiting
    When I get home
    Cause I miss you already
    I miss you
    All I want is for you to pick up
    Every time I call
    Cause I miss you already
    I miss you
    All I ask is that you'll tell me when something's wrong
    Cause I miss you already
    I miss you
    As you drive away
    You burn me with your headlights
    Leave me aflame
    And with each goodnight
    You hollow out my insides
    Your arms, the blades.
  • Silhouettes and Pictures
    These walls breathe so softly
    And cry so sweet
    Whispers, silhouettes and pictures
    Cry so sweet
    I didn't have to hear a word
    Not one moment goes unheard
    I didn't have to hear a word
    These hands move so slowly
    Are you asleep?
    Whispers, silhouettes and pictures
    Cry so sweet
    I know it has to be this way
    But I'll still think about you
    I always knew it would never be the same
    But it won't be the same
    Without you.
  • Glass Rose
    A looking glass the window
    Holds a better place
    Through it I can see her
    as she comes my way
    I wonder does she wonder
    Who left that rose for her that day
    Somewhere in the distance
    I can see her face
    Flawed only with perfection
    As she turns I say
    So did you like the rose that I left for you that day
    Now all I have is a drawer full of photographs
    Of you and I
    That we'll never take
    I know I'll never forget her
    She'll be my glass rose until I say
    So this is how it ends
    how it never begins
    so this is how it ends with us.
    now all I have is a drawer full of photographs
    of you and I
    that we'll never take
    I know I'll never forget her
    She'll be my glass rose until I say.
  • Patterson Pass
    Silence steps with every moment
    The blue subsides and draws me in
    The windmills pass again
    As does the burnt grass
    Blame it on a cigarette
    Soon I'll know this way by heart
    It tore us apart when we couldn't visit
    This river runs so dry
    Still we drowned
    With closed eyes
    Through braided hearts the winds blow broken
    The skies above are lined with the blades
    The sun slows down again
    Behind blackened hillsides
    Where shadows fall with these regrets
    This drive is drawing pictures
    In the heat above
    Trying to convince me
    of a different kind of love.
    (this drive is drawing pictures in my skies)